she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
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