making cat noises will not fix the situation.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
