take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
