just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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