I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
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