mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
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