Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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