dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
