Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
