We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
