They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Randomize
