Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize