glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
