I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
