Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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