This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
