My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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