your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
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