You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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