Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Randomize
