its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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