I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize