She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
