So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
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