Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Randomize
