next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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