Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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