hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Dicks are not precious.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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