He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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