What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
i would one night stand the shit outta him
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "