yea but for you.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.