Whod you bang
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
You can't just leave with hair like that
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
