Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
