Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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