is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
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