Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
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