so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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