Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Randomize
