yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize