Moan for me like Helen Keller
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
