I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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