I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize