How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
