I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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