this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
