is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
