Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
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