Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Mom said you looked used
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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