He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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