He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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