and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
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His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
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I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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