as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Randomize
