U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
